Saturday, November 15, 2008

If you are going to fight with your spouse, don't do it in front of the children

From is this this report Children distressed by family fighting have higher stress hormones:

Children who become very upset when their parents fight are more likely to develop psychological problems. But little is known about what happens beyond these behavioral reactions in terms of children's biological responses. A new study has found that children who are very distressed when their parents fight also have higher levels of cortisol, a stress hormone.

I've heard that children who grow up in abusive situations are likely to abuse their children and/or spouse. It makes sense that children who seem bad behavior are likely to have psychological problems. I hadn't thought before how fights between parents would affect a child's physiology.

So if you are having a fight with your spouse, don't do it in front of the children.

Technorati tags: parenting, children


Marbel said...

My parents never fought in front of the kids, but I could hear them anyway, and that was scary too.

My husband and I sometimes intentionally "argue" in front of our kids, respectfully and civilly, so they can see us disagree, resolve the conflict, forgive as necessary, and move on.

Of course that doesn't work with every topic that a couple might argue about.

Henry Cate said...

Interesting idea. I don't remember Janine and I ever consciously deciding to argue in front of our daughters to teach them. We have disagreed in front of them. My second daughter says the last time she can remember us really fussing at each other was four years ago.