Here are a few excerpts:
Ask a group of seventh-graders how to conduct relationships, and much of their advice could apply just as well to adults: "Don't dance with another girl if your girlfriend isn't at the dance." "Don't hold hands with your best friend's boyfriend." "Tell your parents as little as possible."
Relationships sometimes only involve two clumsy conversations: the asking out and the breaking up.
These maladroit transactions are the training wheels of love, explains Bradford Brown, a human development professor at the University of Wisconsin, ....
That's the scary part. What are children learning about relationships that will actually benefit them as adults?
"They could be playing a joke on you," says Lime Kiln seventh-grader Shannon Bishoff. It's painfully common for a group of boys to pay someone to ask a girl out; $20 is the going rate.
In high school, kids begin to go out with whom-ever they find attractive. But in middle school, relationships are a form of currency among peers, a way to jostle for position.
From what I've read, it is the same in high school. Relationships are about moving up your position in the pecking order.
"Because romance at this stage is such a public affair, you really are essentially creating headline news," Brown says. Sneaking a kiss in a little-traveled spot by the buses after school is dismissed is okay, if you're up for it, which some kids are by eighth grade. And, of course, during Spin the Bottle at boy-girl parties: Making out there is fine, because, hey, you have to. That's where the bottle landed. Nobody can question your judgment, call you a slut. You were just following the rules.
Yuk. Boy, that's so ugly.
This article got me thinking about what my daughters are learning at home about love and relationships. I don't think it resembles anything they would learn at school.
So, on this Valentines day, I ponder on something from the Good Book about charity which is another word for love.
I Corinthians Chapter 13
1. Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.
3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.
4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity denvieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
8 Charity never faileth...
I hope this is what our children will learn about love at home.
Related Tags: romance, middle school, homeschool, dating