tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18436046.post114841222503119797..comments2024-02-15T11:55:02.998-08:00Comments on Why Homeschool: Destructive Family Trends - Part 2Henry Catehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03097237237859928969noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18436046.post-1149021221525509882006-05-30T13:33:00.000-07:002006-05-30T13:33:00.000-07:00I've seen the same statistics you're talking about...I've seen the same statistics you're talking about, but statistics are of limited value when talking about real people with real relationships.<BR/>I think the stats are higher for boyfriends/stepfathers for the same reason that they are higher for any profession where adults have access to other people's kids- predators who like to abuse kids do not hang out where there are no kids. <BR/><BR/>Some creeps look for a relationship bringing children into the home so that they have good cover and easy access. <BR/><BR/>It's not really a question about 'can step parents love their step kids?' Of course they can and do- but it's also important to realize that some scoundrels put the rush on a single parent for nefarious reasons, and single parents need to be wary about this.Headmistress, zookeeperhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14071449326819510530noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18436046.post-1149020099982275522006-05-30T13:14:00.000-07:002006-05-30T13:14:00.000-07:00Families, whether homeschooling or not, need to in...Families, whether homeschooling or not, need to invest time and energy in the marital relationship. But when marriages fail in homeschooling families, the homeschool is often under threat for economic reasons, which does not apply in schooling families. This can create a lot of extra stress, and sometimes keep people in unhappy marriages. <BR/><BR/>This is a huge issue with many implications, but we need more than knowledge about strengthening existing marriages in order to solve it. We also need to know much more about good divorce management and ensuring that children do *not* suffer from being step-kids: many children, my own included, regard their "extra" parent as a welcome new addition to the family.alicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13150238603170281637noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18436046.post-1148770498359039312006-05-27T15:54:00.000-07:002006-05-27T15:54:00.000-07:00This reminds me of Harry Potter's Aunt, Uncle and ...This reminds me of Harry Potter's Aunt, Uncle and cousin. The Aunt and Uncle show their son total preference over Harry Potter. However, I don't think anyone could say the Aunt and Uncle actually love their son. They are not capable of love towards anyone. They do have affection for their son, but that's not the same thing as love. Love requires unselfish actions.<BR/><BR/>So, maybe the parents who report no parental affection towards their stepchildren don't really "love" their own children either.Janine Catehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04078812496080773315noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18436046.post-1148575656890456132006-05-25T09:47:00.000-07:002006-05-25T09:47:00.000-07:00I think there are many issues here and these sorts...I think there are many issues here and these sorts of studies always raise more questions for me than they ever answer. Like I wonder if the reason for divorce as anything to do with the statistics. Was the parent unable to form solid, healthy relationships in the first place? Leading to divorce? And to clinging to the next spouse that came along, despite what was in their children's best interest?<BR/><BR/>How much of the strained relationship has to do with improperly recognizing how much a child grieves over a divorce, no matter how abusive the previous situation might have been. Boys' Town told us during a training that statistically speaking, children and particularly boys did better acasemically and socially in a home with an abusive father than when the parents divorced. That is not to say one should stay in such a relationship, but it does show just how much a child is hurt by divorce. I wish I knew the research they drew upon for that.<BR/><BR/>That anger will naturally be directed on the step-parent, straining the relationship.Hanley Familyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07363108115499781703noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18436046.post-1148515464441846572006-05-24T17:04:00.000-07:002006-05-24T17:04:00.000-07:00Some people do have real love and affection for st...Some people do have real love and affection for step children and grandchildren. And there are many wonderful adoptive families. <BR/><BR/>"Love" takes time and effort and is a choice, whether they come from your body or get dropped off on your doorstep.Janine Catehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04078812496080773315noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18436046.post-1148499557037505032006-05-24T12:39:00.000-07:002006-05-24T12:39:00.000-07:00Interesting study. I'm not sure how I feel about t...Interesting study. I'm not sure how I feel about this. I have always wanted to believe that love for children is not increased by biological connection. Now I have to wonder a little. As a child with two stepparents who married a man who also had two stepparents, I can attest that stepgrandparents go just as crazy over their grandchildren as biological ones do! <BR/>Kim from<BR/>relaxedhomeskool.comAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com